Helpful Help

There is one thing that confuses me about parenting - the concept of "help." I'm told over and over again that if I just need help I've got lots of family in the area who can come to the rescue. They all have good intentions that just fall short of "helpful."

Let's forget the obvious one of where my mom often offers to help, only to end up being unavailable, late or returning Ellie sooner than the original plan.

Let's talk about the times when I'm surrounded by "help."

Sunday I went up to Estes Park with Ellie and Addie. It was by far the worst day I've had in a long time. Just like when Ellie was a baby, it was very difficult to get Addie to sleep in an unfamiliar location. Though she's typically only up for an hour at a time, she was up for 6 hours in the morning and 4 in the afternoon. It was a nightmare, but my mom was there offering to help. "Let me take her and you go take a nap." I don't think she realizes I can't nap when my baby is screaming her head off, especially if it's not normal behavior for her. It's just plain stressful for me.

And then there's other times when family have offered to help and it just messes up the routine and schedule and makes things worse. I end up having to come in and clean up the mess anyway.

How am I supposed to ask for help when I feel like the good intentioned helpers only end up making it worse? Riddle me this.

Cousins: Plan B

I have a confession to make. When my sister announced that she was leaving her husband, the selfish (and very inconsiderate) part of me thought, "Bummer, that means Ellie and Baby Vincent won't ever have cousins the same age as them." I knew that her decision was the right one to make, but I still couldn't help but be disappointed in the idea that my kids wouldn't have cousins they could be close to growing up.

Well we're onto Plan B now! Aunt Erin is out in the dating pool again and as it turns out, many guys her age already have kids Ellie's age! Go figure! There's still hope after all.

Tacky, Reffin! That's just plain tacky!