You always hear that divorce often brings out the worst in people. Strangely, even though I'm no stranger to divorce (my mom went through quite a few while I was younger), I had never actually witnessed it until now.
Without going into details, I see how my mom is acting during her current divorce and I've never seen her more ugly.
I'm sure it's one of those things I just can't fully understand unless it happens to me, but I REALLY REALLY feel like ***IF*** Michael and I were to divorce, we'd treat each other with so much more respect.
I'd like to think that if that were to ever happen to me, I would avoid becoming a person I have little respect for. I hope to never be so ugly.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
What might have been III
Well it looks like I get to find out...
He's back in the picture. I won't go into too many details, but my mom has decided she can't work things out with her husband and is filing for divorce. Meanwhile, she and her ex have gotten back together. I'm going to pass on going into any details on the negatives of the stories... whether or not I approve... whether or not I think she's doing the right thing... things like that. Instead, let's just focus on the happy stuff, because let's face it... I haven't been able to decide how I feel about the entire situation, so what would make me think I could decide now?
Anyway... they're back together. I have said in the past that I thought he'd make a better grandpa than my mom's current husband, and now I'm faced with that being a real possibility. So... as the responsible mother that I am, I have two questions.
1. What, if anything, do I tell Ellie about Grandpa no longer being in the picture?
Do I explain to her that he is no longer around? Do I just wait until she asks and then what? Or do I just assume he'd slowly fade away from her memory?
2. What about Grandpa being replaced by this other guy? How do I introduce him to her?
They've met before and we called him "Gramma's friend, Cary" but if I'm completely honest with myself, ideally they would call him something cute like Papa, Papap, Gramps or Grampster (ha!). Would that be applying too much pressure on the relationship between him and my mom?
Seriously... it's hard for me to hold back and not jump to the assumption that things are going to be great with him in our lives. It's something I've always wanted even if I didn't know how to work it with all the other details.
So.... uh huh.
He's back in the picture. I won't go into too many details, but my mom has decided she can't work things out with her husband and is filing for divorce. Meanwhile, she and her ex have gotten back together. I'm going to pass on going into any details on the negatives of the stories... whether or not I approve... whether or not I think she's doing the right thing... things like that. Instead, let's just focus on the happy stuff, because let's face it... I haven't been able to decide how I feel about the entire situation, so what would make me think I could decide now?
Anyway... they're back together. I have said in the past that I thought he'd make a better grandpa than my mom's current husband, and now I'm faced with that being a real possibility. So... as the responsible mother that I am, I have two questions.
1. What, if anything, do I tell Ellie about Grandpa no longer being in the picture?
Do I explain to her that he is no longer around? Do I just wait until she asks and then what? Or do I just assume he'd slowly fade away from her memory?
2. What about Grandpa being replaced by this other guy? How do I introduce him to her?
They've met before and we called him "Gramma's friend, Cary" but if I'm completely honest with myself, ideally they would call him something cute like Papa, Papap, Gramps or Grampster (ha!). Would that be applying too much pressure on the relationship between him and my mom?
Seriously... it's hard for me to hold back and not jump to the assumption that things are going to be great with him in our lives. It's something I've always wanted even if I didn't know how to work it with all the other details.
So.... uh huh.
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